Sitting

I watched “Lars and the Real Girl” tonight. (It’s one of my favorite movies ever. Seriously, if you haven’t seen it, you should – it’s the most beautiful and genuine movie I’ve ever seen, and it’s just enough off-center for my taste. If I could only watch one movie for the rest of my life, it would be this one.) There’s a scene towards the end of the film when Lars’ girlfriend is really sick, and he comes downstairs to find these three older women he knows from church just sitting and knitting and cross-stitching in the living room.

They offer him food, and they tell him they’ve come to sit with him. One of the women says, “That’s what people do when tragedy strikes. They come over and sit.”

That’s what people do when tragedy strikes. They come over and sit.

I like that. When tragedy strikes, words of comfort mostly sound hollow, distraction can only last for so long, and there’s only so much you can do to make the situation better. But coming over, and sitting – it’s so simple, so unsophisticated, and yet it does more than words or actions really can. Just sitting and being with someone in pain, being present with that person – it’s healing. Just sitting and being, without a need to entertain or be entertained, maybe even with your own version of knitting or cross-stitch – that’s good.

That’s what people do when tragedy strikes. They come over and sit. That’s what I want to do when tragedy strikes. I want to just come over and sit.